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How to Manage Pressures & Expectations as a New Mom

Google this: “Top 10 New Mom Tips.” 

The amount of information that comes up is abundant, to say the least! These articles are all coming from a good place — a place of service that could potentially be extremely helpful for all of you new mommies out there. And I’m sure you’ve Googled several questions throughout your pregnancy, and even more so now in new mommy status.

But let’s look at the other end of the spectrum: the overload of information and opinions could have the opposite effect. All the information out there could, on the other hand, overwhelm you, stress you out, or add to already-existing anxiety and pressure of being a new mother. 

Are you nodding your head yes, yet?

Now, Google searches for information and opinions aren’t limited to babies. We are constantly looking for answers, guidance, and help — even when we aren’t aware of it. Questions we don’t just ask Google, but also our friends, family, and acquaintances:

  • What should I do when…?

  • How should I do this…?

  • What’s the right way to…?

  • What do you think of …?

Sound familiar?

Today, we have access to information that we never had before. We have unlimited access to the suggestions of experts and doctors; we have visibility into the lives of people all around the world, and, heck, we even have visibility into the lives of celebrities! Never has it been easier for us to obtain new knowledge (and never has it been easier for us to compare ourselves to everyone else — whether we mean to or not).  

The thing is, there are always going to be opinions, tips and tricks, studies, and a million lives to measure yourself up again and see who’s doing it “right.” But here’s what you must remember: no one’s opinions, lives, tips, or tricks outdo your intuition, your values, and your life.

What if, instead of asking others what they think, you check in with yourself first. Before you ask your best friend, partner, or Google, ask yourself the following questions:

  • What is my intuition telling me about this? 

  • What feels right for my baby and me? 

  • What is my heart saying to me right now?

  • What was my initial gut reaction to the situation?

Throughout the extremely vulnerable and beautiful process of raising your newborn (and any age child for that matter!), I want to empower you to believe that you (and only you) know best. 

Of course, it’s wonderful to be grateful to everyone who has been helpful to you and your journey so far. Gratitude for your loved ones and community is important, no doubt. However, I’m going to circle it back to you and say, please believe that you know best. 

Final recipe? Gratitude + self-trust + self-love = a bit more ease

Mmm, self-love. One of my favorite topics to gush about! Mommies, it is SO important that you give yourself love, compassion, and care — just as you’re giving  that (and more) to your babies. If mommy isn’t taken care of, how is she going to take care of everyone else? You know that saying, “live your best life?” Well, I’d like to add something to it: “because, by living your best life, you’re spreading that same vibe and energy to others.” 

In whatever way mommy leads her life energetically, that energy is then spread to her children. After all, energy is contagious! So carve out some time for yourself, even if that’s just one hour a day, can mean everything. And checking in with yourself can look like this…

  • What would make me smile or laugh right now? 

  • What can I do today with the little free time I have?

Okay, pause. I know many of you may be thinking, “but I’m exhausted.” And I hear you. So, if there is one thing that you can do for yourself for some self-love, then it’s likely to take a nap and rest. Pro tip: try it without the guilt ;)

If there is anything you take away from this post (even if you’re just scrolling to the end because you didn’t have the time to read it), then it’s these two things:

  1. Listen to yourself and trust that you know what’s best for you and your baby

  2. Make time for self-love and self-care in a way that feels good to you 

And with that, mommy duties await.

Sending you so much love and light on your journey!

Originally published on Love Majka


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